Archive for April, 2007

The “Lost” Short Term Memory Syndrome

LOST

I’ve loved “Lost”, and I’ve hated “Lost”. I swing like a pen­du­lum between these two extremes, and all because some tele­vi­sion writ­ers want to drag out some­thing that prob­a­bly only last another sea­son or two. Cur­rently I’m back to lov­ing it, but up until the sec­ond half of sea­son 3, I was hat­ing it, and with good rea­son, because it was suck­ing wind. After a pretty killer sea­son 2 finale episode, the first block of new episodes for sea­son 3 were less than stel­lar. I know that the pro­duc­ers of the show say they were set­ting up stuff for later in the sea­son, but face it, they still weren’t very good episodes. I was so sick of it I was ready to swear off of the show for eter­nity, but lately they’ve been doing a pretty good job of keep­ing the aver­age Vance glued to the telly week after freak­ing week.

As best as I can gather, the Losties have been on The Island for roughly around 70 days, just south of 2 months. In that time they’ve had 9 of their own die (Scott, Boone, Shan­non, Arzt, Libby, Ana Lucia, Mr. Eko, Nikki, Paulo) and one more if you count the Oceanic Air pilot killed in the first episode, and some of those peo­ple, if the show’s time line is to be believed, died lit­er­ally only weeks ago. Our cast­aways don’t seem very vis­i­bly upset by a lot of the death going on around them.

I attribute this to the “The ‘Lost’ Short Term Mem­ory Syn­drome”. It’s a con­di­tion com­monly found in tele­vi­sion char­ac­ters who crashed on an island 3 years ago and are still liv­ing in that time, yet they’re being watched 3 years in the future on tele­vi­sion. How else can you explain the lack of feel­ings, the for­got­ten things that hap­pen from one week (or day, or what­ever their pas­sage of time con­sists of) to the next?

We’ll be talk­ing in “Lost” time, not real world time, FYI.

On the sec­ond day our Losties are on the island some of them hike to higher ground to see if they can use a radio to con­tact the out­side world, but they pick up sig­nals in French from a radio tower. Shan­non is able to deci­pher them, but many more peo­ple were there besides her. Do they not remem­ber this unseen tower? Why aren’t they look­ing for it?

Sawyer was tor­tured by Sayid roughly a week and a half after they crashed for hoard­ing, yet in last night’s episode, Sawyer and Sayid are pal­ing around and try­ing to get Juliet to talk. Would you be friends with some­one who had tor­tured you not 2 months before? Why isn’t Sawyer try­ing to get even with Sayid for doing this?

Three weeks ago Jinn, Sawyer, Michael and Walt set sail on their boat, which was blown up by the Other known as Tom later that day. That was 3 weeks ago? Feels like for­ever ago.

Sayid loved Shan­non, and she died about on day 48 of their time on the island. If we’re at about day 65+, shouldn’t Sayid still be a lit­tle torn up over her? The guy sure did mourn a long time for his girl, didn’t he?

On day 59, Locke was trapped beneath the blast door in the Hatch. It pierced his thighs, but a week later he’s fine? What gives? I know it’s the “heal­ing pow­ers of the island”, but come on, don’t give me that.

Eight-ish days ago, Michael killed Ana Lucia and Libby. Eight days ago. Three days after that Michael and Walt are given a boat and coor­di­nates by Ben Linus. They leave the island.

On the same day the Hatch explodes. If the Hatch exploded on day 65, and we’re right around day 70 or so, it’s been less than a week since that occur­rence. None of the Losties seem to remem­ber the Hatch, but the Oth­ers talk about the Pur­ple Light that screwed up their nav­i­ga­tion systems.

I guess they for­got about the Num­bers too. And they were such a big deal, weren’t they?

I’ll give them a point of con­sis­tency though — Sawyer has not reverted to call­ing peo­ple nick­names yet. I expect that to change as he con­ve­niently for­gets his deal with Hurley.

Brush With Local Greatness, Vol. 1 : Dan Piraro

Dan-Piraro

About 12 years ago I was work­ing at the Book­stop near the Inwood the­ater in Dal­las and it was my first real job out of col­lege. I was a super­vi­sor there, and one of the things we would do, and if you’ve been into any Barnes & Noble you’ll know this, was put out staff rec­om­men­da­tions. I had rec­om­mended some Bizarro comic strip books in the past, and one night while work­ing the cash reg­is­ter a woman came and paid for her books with a check that said it was from Dan and (Some­body) Piraro. Don’t remem­ber her name.

Dan Piraro was the cre­ator of the Bizarro comic strip, and I knew that the name wasn’t very com­mon, so I care­fully asked, “Is this the Dan Piraro we all know and love?” And she answered that yes it was. Dan’s wife called him over and I said how much I liked his comic and he thanked me. They left, but later I put out another staff rec­om­men­da­tion of “Best of Bizarro, Vol­ume 1″. The card that I put with the book said, “If Dan Piraro is cool he will sign these.” And he obvi­ously was cool, because he did sign them, all of them. I of course snatched one of the auto­graphed copies up. Still have it, too.

He didn’t look like the pic­ture I’ve included at the time, he looked much more eccen­tric, with long curly hair and a goa­tee. The pic­ture next to this makes him almost look Dad-like.

The next time I saw him in our store he was buy­ing a “Do Your Own Divorce in Texas” book. I hope that wasn’t con­cern­ing the woman who’d called him over to say hi to me.

UPDATE :

On April 9 of this year I got up the gump­tion and wrote Dan from the email address given off of his website –

Dan,
About 12 years ago I was work­ing at the Book­stop near the Inwood the­ater in Dal­las and knew that you occa­sion­ally came into our store. I had set out a staff rec­om­men­da­tion of your Best of Bizarro (the first one) and my card under­neath it read “If Dan Piraro is cool he will sign these.”

Suf­fice to say, you were very cool and signed all of them. I still have one, even though my wife won­ders why I keep it around.

Just wanted to say thanks for that.


– Glenn Vance

I had no idea if he would write me back…but three days later he did.

Thanks for the note, Glenn. It was awfully nice of you to thank me after so many years. Hope all is well with you and yours and that you are find­ing life to be grand and groovy. I lived in Dal­las then and live in NYC now. You still in Dal­las?
Dan

Holy moly. He was engag­ing me in con­ver­sa­tion. So I told him about my wish to get my mas­ters and PhD in His­tory and then teach. I thanked him for writ­ing me back and told him to have a good one.

And he wrote back again!

Good luck with your pro­fes­sor­ship. Sounds like a good career and one that hardly ever includes being paged in the mid­dle of the night. As long as you stay away from the co-eds. : )
d

How freak­ing cool is that?

Schoolhouse Rock

Schoolhouse-Rock

School­house Rock, the series of 41 car­toon shorts that used catchy tunes and rep­e­ti­tion to teach kids watch­ing Sat­ur­day morn­ing car­toons about math, Amer­i­can his­tory, gram­mar and sci­ence, began as a brain­storm of David McCall when, in 1971, he noticed that his son could sing pop­u­lar song lyrics but couldn’t han­dle sim­ple mul­ti­pli­ca­tion tables. His solu­tion was sim­ple: Cre­ate a catchy way to learn math by fus­ing it with con­tem­po­rary music and, he reck­oned, the kids would be able to mem­o­rize their math through songs.

McCall was chair­man of the New York ad agency McCaf­frey & McCall, and he put the prob­lem to his under­lings. They sug­gested he hire Bob Dor­ough, a Texas jazz musi­cian known for cre­at­ing catchy music to cre­ate the songs. Dor­ough was will­ing to give the idea a shot, and he plowed through his daughter’s math books, mak­ing up tunes on his piano until he’d cre­ated the trippy bal­lad “Three Is a Magic Number.”

McCall loved Dorough’s song, and the tune was even­tu­ally released as a record by Capi­tol Records under the title Mul­ti­pli­ca­tion Rock. A work­book deal fell through, but Tom Yohe, McCaf­frey & McCall’s cre­ative direc­tor, thought that the songs would go well with ani­ma­tion, so, after doo­dling some pic­tures, which McCall once again loved, they put together a 3 minute film to accom­pany “Three Is a Magic Num­ber”, which they showed to ABC’s head of children’s pro­gram­ming, Michael Eis­ner. Eis­ner was recep­tive to the idea and gave McCaf­frey & McCall the go ahead to cre­ate films for the rest of the mul­ti­pli­ca­tion tables. Gen­eral Mills was brought on as the sole spon­sor of School­house Rock.

Eis­ner also demanded that the big ani­ma­tion stu­dios of Hol­ly­wood that made their Sat­ur­day morn­ing car­toons cut 3 min­utes from each show so that the ani­mated shorts could be run. The stu­dios were not too eager to com­ply, but after prod­ding by Eis­ner that it made good busi­ness sense, the relented.

School­house Rock pre­miered on the week­end of Jan­u­ary 6–7, 1973, with the play list being “My Hero Zero,” “Ele­men­tary, My Dear,” “Three Is a Magic Num­ber” and “The Four-Legged Zoo.” The shorts were aired for 12 years, end­ing in 1985.1

  1. The infor­ma­tion for this piece came from the omnipresent Wikipedia and the totally great School House Rock Site. []

Why Colonel Tigh is the Coolest

Saul-Tigh

Saul Tigh, Exec­u­tive Offi­cer of the Bat­tlestar Galac­tica, is one tough frakkin’ SOB. The man drinks, he swears, he beats up pris­on­ers and crew mem­bers alike with a pas­sion, he over­throws gov­ern­ments, he’s had one of his eyes ripped out of the socket and, to top it all off, he’s had to kill his own wife! How’s that for one tough guy?

Tigh has been my favorite char­ac­ter on BSG since the excel­lent minis­eries launched the show, and it’s funny, since if the guy were real and we were to meet in real life I’d prob­a­bly hate him, mainly from his demeanor. Upon first meet­ing he’d prob­a­bly give one raised nos­tril in a sneer and snarl some­thing degrad­ing, But Michael Hogan makes him so real and flawed that his human­ity (or lack of human­ity, now that the sea­son 3 finally has come and gone) pours out of him.

Now that sup­pos­edly Tigh is a Cylon, I have no idea how they will rec­tify his back story with what we now know he is. Accord­ing to the excel­lent Battlestarwiki.org, Tigh served aboard a war­ship called the Brenik dur­ing the first Cylon war when he was just a teenager. He was released from ser­vice after the war, served aboard civil­ian ships and met Bill Adama dur­ing a bar fight. The two men grew old together while they served the colonies together. How they’re going to make him a Cylon that grew old is beyond me. I don’t know.

I guess what I like about him is his iras­ci­ble char­ac­ter, his take-no-garbage atti­tude and his will­ing­ness to do any­thing that is nec­es­sary to sur­vive. He only seems to have given up that fight twice in his life, once when he’d divorced Ellen and was drift­ing aim­lessly, and then after he’d had to kill Ellen and return to the Galac­tica. Exe­cut­ing Cylon col­lab­o­ra­tors seemed to have helped quench some of his fury, but as a man he was drifting.

Now that he believes that he is a Cylon he has turned back to the one con­stant in his life; serv­ing under Bill Adama as XO. He defi­antly declared upon real­iza­tion that he isn’t human, “My name is Saul Tigh. I’m an offi­cer in the Colo­nial Fleet. What­ever else I am, what­ever else it means, that’s the man I want to be. And if I die today, that’s the man I’ll be.”

God, I love this man. God­speed, Tigh! May you make it to “Earth” so we may all know you in all your ornery glory!