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Why is Everyone Scared of You When You’re Wearing a Ski Mask?

I remember when I was a kid that some kids (not me) when they were walking to school in the cold would wear various things – coats, gloves, hats, and sometimes the invaluably effective ski mask.

I always wanted one. I never got one.

They were awesome. Your face would be warm out in the cold. An efficient piece of clothing for keeping your nose from freezing.

Of course, if you wear one now, people look at you a little funny. You can see it on their faces. “Who’s that shady, yet warm, character over there? Is he going to rob me? Kill me? Maybe blow up a bomb?”

Everyone thinks you’re a terrorist or a bank robber or a mugger now if you wear a ski mask. Which is why I want to rehabilitate the ski mask’s reputation. Who’s with me?

I want a ski mask just so I can drive around with one on. People may stare but I’ll only do good thing while wearing my ski mask – help the environment, care for old people, be kind to animals, go shopping for groceries, all while wearing my trusty, warm and woolly ski mask.

Why can’t we all love the ski mask again? It never stopped loving us.

Published inCurrent Events

One Comment

  1. Elliott Seymour Elliott Seymour

    My sweet Lord, this made me laugh .

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